Two Poems and an pathology ['Witness,' & 'An Old Love']
Witness
Love Poem
My face belongs to whoever sees it
Everything has a meaning but life
Even the bugs strive for existence
God saved man, from God
Ghosts have lonely sins
Her bones are stones
Up and down the hill
Gardens blossom
Spotless skies
Dramatists
August
I can not
rest!...
#708 6/3/05
An Old Love
Around the world from me
are the many lands I've seen--
I, who have longed all his life,
that never shut his eyes
but to look up for his next flight
...for things I've yet to see--
wait, wait, wait, wait where
echoes from poets write,
wait, for far off destinies.
And where my thoughts are
I must go, for there too is my
. Soul; thus, best to poke the
fire again!...
6/3/05 #707
Analysis: I was asked the other day to do a verbal and quick pathology for a poem. It can be a dreadful experienced, especially if the man is a friend. What do you say? Like it or not, it is a worthwhile thing to do, and have done. And I've had a few hundred of my poems analyzed, poked at, chewed up; thus, when asked to analyze a poem, I do it with great care. But I do comprehend I am not going to contribute to anyone other than my own attentive response. Well this poem baffled me and that was not good, but I studied the poem well after he left, I could only give him a few pieces of my thoughts prior to his leaving. I did afterwards mark phrases that caught my attention, good and bad, things that were stunning or difficult, and where the focus was lost. I do trust my intuition, so that is one good thing.
There are three things I try to look at 1) the purpose of the poem, as I understand it to be 2) the central emphasis (problems and concerns, etc), and 3) imagery, tone, meter and so forth, while at the same time trying not to diminish the poetic supervene the poem is trying to give. But then, I do not do pathology but on a few extra occasions other persons poetry, for I have a hard adequate time doing my poetry. But I belief a few comments might be worth mentioning. I guess, if I like the poem, I just like it, period. The Author
Here are two more poems, both distinct in their focus, poetic emphasis; both short poems, but adequate to give a distinctive effect. The tone is of extra importance. An pathology comes along with the two poems, not on Mr. Siluk's poems, for that is for man else to do, but on how he looks at times on other poems, recognizing the aggregate of distinct elements.
--Rosa Penaloza
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